Decisions

So amazing how life on earth is never static. It's always dynamic, ever-changing. There is continually a new normal to adjust to...even for those who aren't as affected by familial growth and loss. God doesn't seem to allow us to stagnate for very long...to live in too much comfort for a great time. Generically, change in experience seems to be the best breeding ground for facilitating change in the heart.

Our change has happened quickly in our home, as we've added three kids in less than two years. We are confronted routinely by our own abundant sinfulness in different phases of raising our kids-- and not necessarily as a direct result of raising our kids. While we are the "victims" of the change that God brings at times, not at all holding the reins, because HE has changed the circumstances without our input, through that, we often come to places where we do hold the reins (I concede this phrase from a human perspective, because the sovereignty and providence of God trumps all that I do, regardless), and God brings us to the point where we need to make decisions that will alter our course, whether temporarily or permanently. Frankly, I would almost rather be the hapless Christian, passive in the external, only accepting things from God's hand. And in a way, this is what I love about being a wife: the convenience of passing the buck. Sure, it's not always the easiest task to submit to your husband or God's plan. BUT, often, it's far easier to do that than to have to shoulder the enormous responsibility of decisive resolve. There are too many variables in action, too many hypotheticals in play.

Providentially, my Bible-reading has been in the book of Acts and Judges recently. Acts has the apostles essentially tossing dice to determine the next guy to serve. LOVE IT! How easy would it be if we had our divine dice that we could pull off the shelf every time we came to a crossroads? Or what if I had a urim and thummim hanging in my coat closet for the occasional head-scratcher? Well, I don't. So from Acts, I go to Judges Two, where I was reading yesterday. God tells the Israelites that they are to conquer this nation and route that people-group, and gives them allotments for each of their tribes. It also states in chapter Two and Three that God puts people in their way in order to test them and their faithfulness to His plan for their inheritance. God even subjugates Israel constantly throughout their history to test their allegiance to Him. And as I've been meditating on this particular aspect of what happened in the ancient land, it struck me that back in Joshua (which I finished reading last week), the Gibeonites were a people-group that God put in the way of the Israelites for testing. And Israel, in accordance with their Old Testament record, failed once again. The Gibeonites tricked Israel into making an alliance with them, by pretending to be from a distant nation, so that Israel would not devastate them, per God's plan. The failure of Israel was not in being fooled by the cleverness of these shrewd people, but in not consulting God about what to do. This concept is further expounded in Judges 1, when the founder of the second city called "Luz" is set free and subsequently becomes a snare to Israel, again, because of their failure to consult the Lord.

So yes, while it would be nice, not to mention, fashionable, to have a urim and thummim to consult the Master of the Universe, my recent reading has been remarkable in bringing me to the understanding that I essentially have BETTER than that. I don't want to sound trite, but I have Jesus! Because of Him, I can actually come to God and consult Him about my decisions, and His Holy Spirit is with me. And while I won't have something physical and tangible to direct me, the sin would be in NOT consulting the Lord. I am free to decide what I will, as long as it is in accordance with what He wills, which is always in congruence with the Bible, which is in lock-step with His Spirit, putting all of my unsinful decisions right in the center of His will. Submission in prayer is foremost, and movement there-from is free! So the angst and guesswork should come out of decision-making and remind me that in everything, EVERYTHING, I should guard against the mistake of not consulting the Lord, who has given me confident access to Himself through His Son! So, while I don't want to oversimplify here, given that God gives us wise counsel through His people as well, I do want to remember the profoundly easy step that I have often been guilty of overlooking: pray first.